I’m curious to hear people’s thoughts on putting salaries on shidduch resumes (I’m helping a friend)… a shadchun they spoke to said “absolutely not” but I think this person’s salary and how it has grown over the years is a testament to their talent, work ethic, and most importantly ability to provide… I don’t see how someone who makes good money including their salary is much different from someone very good looking posting their picture… I’m especially curious to hear thoughts from the members here- is it inappropriate to include salary? should it be?

Hashem is the ultimate decider of someone's ability to provide and we should trust that if we value and take the actions necessary, we will be taken care of. Looking at a salary I think is not a Jewish approach to marriage nor success in business. So in my opinion, strong no and a big red flag.

I agree it's similar to sharing a picture, but I think it boils down to simply being culturally unacceptable. Especially in the US salary information is considered extremely private and sharing it would be considered a major faux pas. It's possible at some point that could change. It wasn't normal to share pictures 20-30 years ago either. Let's not pretend people don't try to figure this information out though. They just need to feel like they're being discreet.

@curved-toothbrush-84425 lol! I’m curious though if salaries were to be more commonly added, do you think it would be a good thing or the opposite?

Salaries can change on a time. Marriage is forever. This is silly! (don’t let me stop others from voicing other opinion please!)

lol so can peoples faces and bodies but we put pictures!

^ ^ I don’t think we put pictures. That is a very modern thing and in general the frum community (to my understanding) looks down upon that. But idk I never went through the system

I don't think it's the putting it on a resume that's bad. It's the caring about it too much that is. But people already care about it and I don't think being open about what people care about is a bad thing.

Generally speaking @mysterious-tomato-10057 would you agree that income no longer being a faux pas would be a good thing?

I want people to talk freely about their income openly, and recognize it is simply the current brachah they are receiving from Hashem, without taking “credit” for it thinking it should be a relevant point of marriage. The two concepts here can’t be mixed in my opinion. As long as people think income is a measurement of a person, it will remain a private matter. If we want it to be a public transparent thing so that everyone can learn from one another, we need not measure a person by their income. That means it wouldn’t be on a resume.

I’m against shidduch resumes in general

@fresh-pilot-83865 from your question, it sounds like your friend has a high salary that has grown in recent years. Assuming that it’s an appropriate thing to write on your shiduch resume, wouldn’t a line chart of their income over multiple periods make more sense?

If they really feel the need to show off their talent and work ethic on a piece of paper maybe they can send their professional resume attached to their shidduch one?

@steep-dog-55906 there is a blurb section but my marketing mind tends to push “show, don’t tell” lol similar to with a picture - a lot of these buzzwords mean different things to different people and someone saying they have talent, work ethic, or an ability to provide is not the same as someone showing theyre earning 6 figures 3-4 years into their career. I do value what Baruch said though about not making salary a measurement of a person…

Very yes to everything @mysterious-tomato-10057 said. There's lots of people with excellent work ethic and talent who just don't have the salary because Hashem didn't want them to have it, and lots of people who have money and none of the work behind it. And outside of the person's character, ability to provide is 100% from Hashem, and can be given or taken away in the blink of an eye. I'm no saying this doesn't come up in dating, but it seems crass to put it on a resume.

Definitely not. If someone is earning real money, trust me people will find out without posting it on the resume itself. To me it just seems socially off to put it on.

If people are attractive would they not find it out without a picture?

Potentially, but from my experience people talk very freely about people who make real money while I have never heard someone tell me, so and so is very pretty.

A person's salary says a lot about them - They're responsible, hardworking, mature, dependable. Very relevant for shidduchim.

I know people with incredibly high salaries that are none of those things.

This will never catch on in the yeshivish world because the number is most likely $0 😝